I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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