I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
