I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
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