so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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