yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
