Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
