Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.

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  (516): Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses. http://tfl.nu/khuc
  Replies (12) Good night (662) Bad night (1792)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?

  (1-312): View more from Illinois

  not while she was awake

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  (312): she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl? (1-312): not while she was awake http://tfl.nu/qknf
  Replies (15) Good night (2651) Bad night (1371)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it

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  (940): just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it http://tfl.nu/6p5c
  Replies (50) Good night (902) Bad night (4830)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.

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  (610): Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital. http://tfl.nu/94uz
  Replies (39) Good night (6070) Bad night (2931)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...

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  (561): Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend... http://tfl.nu/snfb
  Replies (23) Good night (1286) Bad night (4523)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.

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  (601): He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows. http://tfl.nu/pp93
  Replies (15) Good night (6948) Bad night (1979)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated

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  (812): I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated http://tfl.nu/yas8
  Replies (6) Good night (962) Bad night (3324)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here

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  (850): There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here http://tfl.nu/c3ng
  Replies (14) Good night (2320) Bad night (832)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt

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  (412): Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt http://tfl.nu/ilc7
  Replies (27) Good night (2766) Bad night (1536)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.

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  (810): I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/qnr4
  Replies (6) Good night (562) Bad night (1498)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.

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  (401): I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you. http://tfl.nu/woyu
  Replies (7) Good night (848) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with

  (1-210): View more from Texas

  You went over didnt you?

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  (210): He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with (1-210): You went over didnt you? http://tfl.nu/ykhn
  Replies (5) Good night (951) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends

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  (304): I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends http://tfl.nu/jtxo
  Replies (6) Good night (510) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew

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  (716): I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew http://tfl.nu/lady
  Replies (4) Good night (1038) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.

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  (+44): I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices. http://tfl.nu/eayv
  Replies (2) Good night (565) Bad night (241)

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