he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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