lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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