I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
