Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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