just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize