I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
