I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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