he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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