I wish my penis had an off switch
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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