Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
