wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Randomize
