whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
All I want is dick and wine.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
