So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
