One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
