I need help removing her.
high people should be assigned attendants
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
did i walk over a car last night?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize