we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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