The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize