We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize