Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You might as well just give her the money now.

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(814): Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it. (610): You might as well just give her the money now. http://tfl.nu/i76w

Replies (72) Good night (3926) Bad night (1425)
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(713): View more from Texas

I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...

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(713): I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist... http://tfl.nu/i7x2

Replies (15) Good night (4774) Bad night (792)
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(812): View more from Indiana

McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?

(1-812): View more from Indiana

All of them

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(812): McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want? (1-812): All of them http://tfl.nu/mhdi

Replies (42) Good night (9811) Bad night (693)
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(727): View more from Florida

would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?

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(727): would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right? http://tfl.nu/emka

Replies (7) Good night (3398) Bad night (955)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.

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(202): Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this. http://tfl.nu/0xw5

Replies (7) Good night (3032) Bad night (1076)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

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(309): Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me. http://tfl.nu/c51e

Replies (7) Good night (1051) Bad night (2151)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.

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(715): Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober. http://tfl.nu/abtg

Replies (2) Good night (3436) Bad night (876)
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(628): View more from California

That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.

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(628): That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM. http://tfl.nu/93q7

Replies (56) Good night (6905) Bad night (805)
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(224): View more from Illinois

I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania

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(224): I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania http://tfl.nu/5wck

Replies (14) Good night (2409) Bad night (625)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)

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(978): Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :) http://tfl.nu/2ww0

Replies (8) Good night (1510) Bad night (622)
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(851): View more from

Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.

(522): View more from

Don't break up.

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(851): Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th. (522): Don't break up. http://tfl.nu/7rul

Replies (12) Good night (2211) Bad night (517)
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(706): View more from Georgia

He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.

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(706): He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories. http://tfl.nu/ce15

Replies (15) Good night (2053) Bad night (485)
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(518): View more from New York

he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.

(732): View more from New Jersey

do you still have it? i kinda want to see.

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(518): he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner. (732): do you still have it? i kinda want to see. http://tfl.nu/j8xe

Replies (4) Good night (1923) Bad night (576)
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(217): View more from Illinois

Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..

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(217): Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself.. http://tfl.nu/ozpb

Replies (4) Good night (506) Bad night (508)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!

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(612): Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas! http://tfl.nu/ggjg

Replies (6) Good night (689) Bad night (202)

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