Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
