so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
