After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
