thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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