You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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