I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
