Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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