Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Boobs are out for the taking
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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