You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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