Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
