You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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