Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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