Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize