Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
