Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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