Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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