i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
