im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
