i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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