there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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