i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
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