It's like God shit irony all over that family
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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