how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
We smell like vodka and hangover
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