before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
soo... how was my night?
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